A Soccer Player?

So I've been waiting since practically the day I found out I was pregnant, to feel this sweet baby move/kick. Everyone has told me to start expecting it around 20 weeks. So, of course, I have been expecting it. I don't really expect to feel anything when I'm busy moving around, so any time I have the chance to sit still and just relax, I do. I sometimes found myself poking my stomach trying to irritate her a little, just until she moves around.

I had recently read an article that talked about feeling babies move inside your tummy. Most people naturally refer to it as a kick, but the article talked about how when they are this little (a lovely ripe spaghetti squash), chances are, you can't feel a kick. Instead, it's their entire body flipping around. Makes sense. Maybe we have a gymnast on our hands...

Our pastor, Eric, had asked me back on March 11, which marked 20 weeks and 2 days, if I had felt her yet. I sighed and said no, nothing yet...but his response was, "Well, it's coming." So on the way home from church I prayed about it and asked God to show me a sign that she was in there and healthy. Considering I feel/look like a giant moose, I figure that's a pretty solid sign she's in there...but I was hoping for more of a subtle little kick or something. 

That night Danny and I were sitting on the couch watching TV, instead of being productive, and wa-laa! I felt something. I've had the hardest time describing it, but I know it was her. It was by far the most amazing feeling I've ever had. It felt like a little thump from the inside. I felt like it was her knocking on my tummy saying, "Lady, chill out and stop poking me, here I am." Fortunately, I've been able to feel here at least a teeny bit a little every day since then. Finally being able to feel her made this whole thing real. Trust me, the mini-buddha belly has definitely made this experience real as well, but I enjoyed this milestone a little more. :) Right when I felt her for the first time, Danny mentioned that he was positive she was going to be a soccer player. I disagree. She's going to be a dainty little dancer. :) I can't wait to see what she actually ends up doing...maybe a little of both?

I have "Soccer Mom" written all over me. I've always said that I want to be the mom who always has the cool snacks. I remember growing up and always wanting to go to those certain houses after school because they always had the coolest/yummiest snacks. That sounds uber-dorky, but hey, that's one thing I remember about being a kid. I can see it now...pulling up to the soccer games with loads of unnecessary junk in tow. I'll have the orange slices, Capris Suns, "#1 Soccer Mom" blingy shirt, and many more cliche "Soccer Mom" details. You just wait. 

Back to Harper Grace's flips and tricks...Danny hasn't been able to experience the movement yet. Whenever I start to feel something, he puts his hand in that same spot, but he hasn't felt anything. My mom, on the other hand, felt her the other night. It was neat seeing her face light up when she felt her little grandbaby move. She feels babies move all the time considering she works with pregnant women all day, but it's a whole new experience when you're related to the little bundle of joy doing the kicking. 

I am continually finding myself amazed at the miracle of a baby. How does something smaller than a pea have a heartbeat? When we went in for our first appointment, we could barely see anything on the screen, but the heartbeat was clear as day and was something like 165 beats per minute. That absolutely blows my mind. How does something the size of a blueberry have all 4 limbs and a tongue? It blew my mind to know that by 12 weeks, all her major body systems were completed. How does that happen? Although I know I'll never knew, I continue to thank God for giving us the opportunity to experience it. 

I've been doing a lot of thinking about becoming a mom and Danny becoming a dad. Question run through my head constantly. For example:

• Are we ready for this? (No, but thank goodness we have a couple more months.)
• Can we afford a child right now? (No, but then again, we'll never be able to afford it. However, we'll find a way to make it work.) 
• Do either of us know how to be a parent? (Absolutely not. We don't have a clue what we're doing.) 
• I love sleep. I mean really, really love sleep. Can I even function on only a few hours of sleep? (Not sure, but fortunately, Danny can. This will probably be a huge wake up call for me...literally.)
• How will I go about teaching my daughter about values and morals? (I don't know how our parents did it, but I'd like to think that Danny and I have the same morals and values. That's one reason I think we were drawn to each other so quickly. How do you teach your child about what's right and what's wrong? I assume we'll find out sooner or later.)
• Will I be a good mom? Will she be proud to be my daughter? (I want my daughter to feel about me the way I feel about my mom. I adore her. I have every second of my life. I'd do anything in the world for her and I know she would do the same for me. I couldn't be more proud to be her daughter. She continuously does things that remind me how lucky I am to have her. I want my daughter to feel that way about me.)

I can say with confidence that neither of us have a clue what we're doing. We don't know what to expect and we don't have any idea how to be parents...however, we couldn't be more excited and thankful for this experience. I can't wait to be a mom. I'm constantly humbled that God has trusted us with this task. As I've said, we currently don't know what we're doing, however, I have complete confidence that He will provide us with every bit of knowledge we will need to be successful parents. I don't know much...but I don't know one thing: Harper Grace is going to be the most loved, adored, and cherished baby girl in the world. Mark my words.

20 Weeks

21 Weeks

My sister, Lexi, bugs me about writing new posts after it's been a while. I have ever intention of doing one per week...but that hasn't happened. Things have been crazy busy with school, so I just haven't had time to collect my thoughts and actually type them out. However, when I do have the time and put forth the effort, she sees the weekly pictures and sends me a message like, "Wow, you're getting huge!" Thank you, Lu. :) You sure do know how to make a chunky lady feel more confident. :)